I got to draw on ditto sheets and make worksheets for you to solve!! Then Mrs. Ross will take the ditto sheet into the teacher’s lounge and turn that thing around over and over while her arm jiggles and she makes copies for the whole class. Then I will give you your interview assignment and I will judge your work. If I like it you will get a red smiley face. If I don’t like it you might get a Nice Try! or a Do over!
1. If you have 50 cents and Tangy Taffy costs 35 cents and you eat the whole Tangy Taffy and Anna Ruth doesn’t eat hers, should you beg her until she shares even if she says “stop begging you always beg?”
2. If your wrap-around skirt falls off during “Land of The Silver Birch Home of The Eagle” dance in music class, do you just stand there in your tights? Or do you let Mrs. Williams put it back on you, even though she is your music teacher and she is basically dressing you in front of the whole class while they do the “boom diddy boom boom boom diddy boom boom” part while they stare at you instead of doing their knee-bops?
3. What do you do when you get to go on the Girl Scout Hay ride when you’re not even a Girl Scout and you can’t hold it?
4. What are ps and qs when Mrs. Ross says mind your ps and qs? YOU MAY NOT ASK MRS. ROSS THIS ANSWER. YOU MAY USE THE ENCYCLOPEDIA BRITTANICA. YOU MAY NOT ASK AMY CLARK JUST BECAUSE ALWAYS GETS A RED SMILEY FACE EVERY DAY OF HER LIFE.
5. Why does gravity ruin some people’s hair feathers but never Ricky Schroeder’s? Why when you bring a picture of Ricky Schroeder to the beauty parlor to show them does your hair end up looking exactly like Mrs. Johnson’s who has B.O.? Please answer in complete sentences.
6. Do you think third grade is too young to go with someone? How about is it too young to have your own style of writing? Do you like the game concentration what’s your occupation? BONUS FUN: TRY YOUR OWN STYLE OF WRITING HERE. IT DOES NOT NEED TO BE D’NEALIAN FOR ONCE IN YOUR LIFE.
7. The end. Don’t forget to check your work. I will give you a grade of E for Excellent VG for Very Good G for Good S for satisfactory or N for needs improvement. Forget it. Mrs. Ross just said I can’t give out grades but I can’t erase on a ditto sheet. So mentally just forget about this part and good luck.