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Call it worrying, call it anxiety, call it impatience– even when life feels pretty great and the work/life trains run mostly smoothly, my brain reverts back to station NO CHILL.

Some people find their way out of a stress vortex through gratitude practice. Often when I count my blessings (which I do! frequently!!) I nose-dive into all I should do with those blessings; realistic sane things like keeping my family plus the entire world safe and loved forever…

I feel so grateful for my healthy happy parents, and so so lucky for my kind husband who should probably have his cholesterol checked, and my dear precious children the internet is probably ruining, oh and the fact that I can get by coloring my greys with a $7.99 drug store root touch up kit and OH CRAP NONE OF THIS IS SUSTAINABLE IT’S ALL DOWN HILL FROM HERE. 

Station NO CHILL.

A few years ago I learned that curiosity kills anxiety. Curiosity does not come naturally to me, with the exception of curiosity about other people. I forget to get curious about my own life. In the rare moments I remember to look with curiosity at whatever anxiety pellet my brain gnaws on, it calms me immediately.

So, I’m making wonder intentional. I plan to make a daily list of questions on which to wonder. I’ll leave them as questions with no answers, on purpose.

It fits nicely with the season, too. The Maccabies worried about their meager oil not lasting. We get to wonder about how that oil lasted for eight days, and if the more expensive Chanukah candles are really worth it (they are). Star of wonder, star of might! Not star of generalized angst, star of fear. Walking in a winter wonderland, not worryland!

This season, leave station NO CHILL for a while and wonder with me. Wonder means letting go of answers. Wonder means making room for possibility.

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Back to Before

I. Ever "after" Born out of the combination of full-time parenting and part-time self-employment, the twin approaches of get it going and good enough take me far . Yet in my mad dash toward done or "after," I've often lacked the patience to buckle down and dive into the minutia of "before" where rich learning occurs; the kind… Read More

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10 Lessons From 10 Years Creating Online and off

In college I majored in the Pretend Arts, and aimed to pretend other people's words, professionally. Directing, producing, and writing my own material scared the character shoes off of me. Enter, life. In my thirties parenting made me a daily director and producer. I took charge of the most unreliable cast ever known; one who… Read More

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THEN AND NOW #ThenAndNowKids and #CPTC

This post is sponsored by the Center for Parent and Teen Communication; a new resource for every parent navigating the teen years You bravely delivered your pacifiers to the pediatrician’s office “for the new babies” a little before you were ready. We spent hours on vacation patiently building an intricate toy space shuttle, only to… Read More

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Fall Events: Join me!

I bet your fall calendar already feels tighter than my hamstrings (impossible), but how many of those appointments and obligations spark connection, creativity, intention, or FUN? I present, for your consideration: MONDAY EVENING OCTOBER 15th   When you’re a perfectionist with a great idea, goal or project, it can often feel like you’re hitting red… Read More

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Purple and Yellow Time

Of all four seasons, running jogging in summer takes last place for me. This summer's humidity made jogging ambling even more brutal. I did it anyhow. That said, I always look forward to Purple and Yellow Time on the running path, despite Purple and Yellow Time occuring in the heat of late August. Sadly, I didn't… Read More

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